A shorter entry to make up for the monster
Ahhhhh, it’s Christmas Eve!!! KD is back for a less morbid entry!!!! Yeah, I still miss my puppy, but it’s so hard to mope around this time of year when Christmas songs are playing everywhere and everyone else is so happy.
I woke up at 7:00 this morning and carried all our presents up from the basement. I piled them in front of the fireplace, and Amber will sort them once she gets her lazy butt out of bed. (Actually, I shouldn’t be hypocritical; I’m in bed too.)
Every Christmas Eve, we have something interesting/unusual for dinner. Like one year we had lobster, one time we had Cornish hens, last year we had frog legs… Well, this year we’re having smoked duck! I’m excited. I’ve never tried duck. Of course it will be weird without the puppy under the table waiting for dropped scraps. Maybe someone will actually have to clean the floor now! (Hope it’s not me.)
Well, I’m gonna go download some songs, I think (legally, of course, ahem). Merry Christmas, everyone!!!! Parting thought: HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!
KD
Longest entry ever
Hello again. I was going to wait to write until I figure out my life, but then I realized something: Why have a diary if you only write when things are just hunky-dory? That’s not all of who I am, and it doesn’t reflect what’s happened in the past few days…
Let’s start with yesterday. I learned that my dog’s heart was failing and we would have to put her to sleep (she went waaaay downhill again; she could hardly walk). I took that blow stoically enough on the outside, but really I was not willing to let her go. My parents set the appointment for today at 4:00 so that both of my performances in the talent show would be over.
Last night’s talent show came and went; I really don’t remember much about it except I forgot some of the words to the song. (I did find out later that I was on TV, but I didn’t get to see myself; you’ll find out why later.)
After we got home, it was clear that Tawny needed to be put to rest. She kept pacing the floor and collapsing, breathing like every lungful cost her so much effort. She didn’t seem to be in any pain, though, so I figured she’d be OK for one more day.
I made a few phone calls, then decided to spend the night, Tawny’s last night, in the kitchen beside her blanket. A few minutes after I was settled on my folding chair-bed thingy, Tawny started to cry softly. I called my dad, but when he came down, of course she went quiet. A few minutes later, though, she was uttering, I swear, the beagle equivalent of screams of pain. Every time she cried, I felt like something inside me was tearing and bleeding. It was horrible and I don’t want to describe that anymore.
We finally reached the vet at like 10:30, and he said he’d meet us at the clinic to put her to sleep that night. I grabbed the first pair of sweatpants I found and ran to call Amber (who was on a date). Tawny was silent the whole car ride, but not in a peaceful way. It was like she was too exhausted to cry anymore. I stroked her side all the way to the vet, and it felt like her heart was pounding and her breathing was rough and unsteady.
When we got to the vet, she took the shot without a fight. We were all crying when he did it, and Mom even gave her a kiss. My hand was on her stomach when she took her last breath. I felt a sense of relief then, because I knew her pain was over. Wish it was that easy for me…
Of course, all this time I was crying on and off. We packed her away in a box with her favorite blanket, her collar, and a small treat (my touch), and took her home. I lay in bed with my parents for a while, but then my dad started snoring so I went to my own room. I still didn’t get much sleep.
Then this morning, I heard a sad song and started crying all over again. I worried I would cry during the two tests I had today, or worse, the talent show. But I didn’t. And I won first prize. Mom reminded me of how much Tawny loved to listen to me sing and play piano, and I thought of her.
We buried our puppy on my grandparents’ farm today beside a grove of trees. On the way there, Dad put her in the backseat near the window because she loved to look out and watch the scenery pass by.
I am still in a sort of shock, I think. I still see Tawny everywhere, I hear her next to the piano, I think I’m nudging her paw with my foot when it’s really a notebook or something. Mom moved the Christmas candy to a more secure place on the table so Tawny wouldn’t jump up and grab it. Amber shut her door so Tawny wouldn’t eat the food in her room. It’s going to take a while to get over the loss of my baby. I’ve been with her ever since I was five. I was there for her first funny beagle bark and there for her last breath. I was there for almost her whole life, and my life is just beginning.
OK, now that I’ve ranted forever, I probably should get ready to sign off. If anybody read this, thanks. I feel a lot better now that I got all that crap out of my system. Parting thought: R.I.P. BABY, I’LL ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU.
KD
My eventful weekend
Hey all. Sorry for the delay in entries, but it’s been a very exhausting weekend. We thought we were going to have to put Tawny to sleep, but she has made a miraculous recovery! That wasn’t until last night, though. Sunday morning, Amber and I stayed home from church with Tawny on a blanket between us because we were afraid she would die while we were gone. We kept comforting each other when one of us would burst into tears. I mean, we’ve had this dog forever, since I was in kindergarten and she was in first grade. All the time we were sitting there, she barely lifted her head, but once, she put her muzzle right next to my cheek and just kept it there, then did the same to Amber. We think that’s her way of saying she was glad that we were there.
Now, though, she’s not only walking around and wagging her tail, she’s eating dog food as if she’d been starving for days! True, she won’t touch hard kernels anymore so we switched to canned, but it’s a vast improvement from her not wanting to eat at all. I guess the vet knew what he was doing when we took her to him; his remedies worked! This morning, I found her snoozing by my bedroom door as always.
Anyway, this weekend was also the time for making Christmas candy. I was so restless when waiting for the vet to call with Tawny’s blood test, I made 100 cookies! That’s right, not exaggerating. It’s not like the recipe was hard or anything, but it still took most of the afternoon.
Well, I suppose I should try to finish some of the homework I was too tired to get done last night. (And, OK, Beyoncé had an interview on Open House Party that I had to listen to. But hey, I was scanning papers at the same time!) See y’all later! Parting thought: ONE TWO STEP!!!!!! (Ciara lyrics)
KD
I am back, after three days of silence
Hi. I’m in study hall, wondering if my life will ever be ordinary. Actually, I think I’d be bored to death with an ordinary life. But when you’re blind your life isn’t ordinary to begin with, then add my crazy family and my evil teacher and the bomb threat our school had yesterday… get the picture yet?
I honestly don’t know where that thought came from. Maybe I’m just feeling philosophical today.
We have study hall in the cafeteria, and the odor coming from the kitchens is unbelievably disgusting. It smells like my grandpa’s pigs (that he used to raise but doesn’t anymore) stampeded the place. And the poor freshmen actually have to eat that stuff!!! Wow.
Hmmm, the bell should have rung by now, but maybe, since we missed like half of school yesterday because of the bomb threat (which, by the way, was a joke; there was no bomb), we have an irregular schedule. I probably should think about shutting down, though. See ya later! Parting thought: GOOGLE IS SAVING MY LIFE!!!!!!! (I have to look up quotes from Antony and Cleopatra for aca dec, and I’ve just been typing them in instead of actually having to look through my book on tape, which would take HOURS. Thank you, Google!!)
KD
Lots of distractions
Hey all. I’m sick. Not in the mind (I’d like to think), but physically sick. As in, baaad cold. Bad enough that I stayed home from school and basically slept all day. The really traumatic part is that I haven’t been able to sing for three days! If you know me, you know that’s a BIG problem. I sing everywhere–even when I do homework, I sing to myself sometimes. Call me crazy, but it really helps me concentrate. So yeah, I’ve been very huffy and irritable this weekend for that reason.
On a happier note, I had a chance to see The Chronicles of Narnia before I became bedridden. I really, really liked it! Highly recommended!
OK, I started writing this entry at like 7:30, and now it’s 8:05. Between having an interesting online convo with J, and my mom freaking out because she thinks Dad is going to fall through the ceiling (he’s in the attic right now), I’ve had some minor distractions. Doesn’t look like tonight’s the night for a long, in-depth, intimate entry; try and master your grief, won’t you?
I’d better go calm Mom down. Parting thought: MY HEAD HURTS!!!!!
KD
Random Saturday morning thoughts
Yeah, I know, I didn’t write yesterday. I was at lovely pep band from like 5 to 9 last night. I wouldn’t have stayed for both the basketball games, but it will help me letter in band. However, I brought a book, so it wasn’t pure torture.
I’m lying in my parents’ bed (they’re gone and I’m dog-sitting), listening to the Rick Dees weekly top 40. G’s favorite song in the world (hehehehe) just came on: “Stickwitu” by the Pussycat Dolls. And Beyoncé and Kelly from DC were both on the countdown, so I was excited. Well, as excited as you can get when you just woke up, anyway.
Tawny is snoring on her blanket on the floor. I was so tired I didn’t notice her snoring last night, but now I don’t see how I could have missed it. Is it normal for a dog to snore this much?
Anyway, I think I’ll go take a look at the Braille Bookstore
and see if I can find any treasures. Now for the parting thought: I’M A GUINEA PIG!!!!!!! (Confused again? Look at this!)
KD
Rants about the holidays, clocks, homework…
Shut up! No one said to open your mouth!
Sorry, I just got tired of starting all my entries with something boring like “hi” or “hello,” and I figured DC lyrics would satisfy my discontented soul. It worked.
Anyway, guess what? I am officially a performer in the KHS talent show!!!! And I’m the fourth act this year, so I can actually relax for most of the show, as opposed to last year when I was like number ten or something.
I got nearly all of my Christmas shopping done. I’d give you the gift rundown, but I have people who read this diary on my shopping list. Let me just say that G will probably like her present, Mary will flip out when she opens hers, Mom will be delighted (which isn’t saying much because she’s a mom, and if she doesn’t like something, of course she’s not going to let on), Dad will find his gift practical and useful, and Kaitlin will be nice whatever I get her. (I haven’t found a gift for her or Amber yet.) I also have to get gifts for my Secret Santa recipient in aca dec. Again, I shall not reveal who he/she is, lest it leak out. (Don’t see how it would, but I’m paranoid, haha.) I’ll be back after I eat supper; hopefully this entry doesn’t get deleted.
OK, now where was I? I don’t remember. Oh! I wanted to tell you about the Braille clock that shakes your bed that I might buy instead of a watch. (Aren’t I indecisive?) Anyway, it sounds really cool. All I’ve ever had are talking clocks, so it could take some getting used to, but on the other hand (clock joke!!!!!!! Other hand!!!!! Get it? Never mind…), I’d have a way to wake myself up without rousing the entire world as well!
OK, I have aca dec homework, so I’d better start thinking about doing it. I have to scan a lot of pages, though, which is dull work. Hopefully I don’t fall asleep doing it (it’s happened before). Here is a parting thought: THERE’S NOTHING ABOUT MISTLETOE IN THE BIBLE!!!!!!! (Confused? Click here to see what I’m talking about)
KD
Musings from the living room couch
Hi. I am soooo tired, it’s not even funny, but I thought I’d let y’all in on the highly interesting story of KD’s life. (Well, as interesting as KD’s life ever gets, that is.)
Talent show tryouts were today, and this may seem weird, but the song I chose to do was the one that gave me the most trouble on my CD. I guess I feel that I must attack this song and conquer it! Or, I could just be an idiot…
Well, I’m thinking of getting myself a graduation present. It’s this really pretty Braille watch I found at MaxiAids, and KD thinks she may be in love. Not that I don’t like the watch I have now (it’s just not as nice), but you don’t graduate every year, now do you? Didn’t think so.
I’m downstairs on the couch and Lola my laptop’s battery is dying, so I’d better end this before I lose it all. Good night, ye patrons. Parting thought: SOMETIMES YOU FEEL LIKE A NUT–SOMETIMES YOU DON’T!!!!!
KD
Short, sweet, and pointless
Hiya. I am once again in biology, and everyone’s taking their tests. I get an extra day, though, because I just got my notes yesterday. I’m trying to type really quietly so as not to distract anyone, but it is probably having a devastating effect on my grammar and capitalization. Of course, I always proofread so it doesn’t matter that much. It does take extra time, but I have a whole class period, mwahaahha.
Hey! Speaking of having whole class periods of leisure time, I think I’m going to see if I can get the movie trailer for The Pink Panther to play now. It wouldn’t work when I tried before, and I really wanna see Ms. Beyoncé’s next venture into Movieland. I shall write more later. Parting thought: SOMETHING SMELLS FUNNY IN HERE.
KD
The day’s events, with a little rantiness here and there
Hi. It’s really late and I should be in bed. Well, actually, I’m sitting up in bed, but I should be lying down sleeping. But I had to write today to pass along this important news: KD’s paper is done!!!!! Who knows what grade I’ll get on it, but at least he has it in his hand (unless he lost it, in which case I shall not be particularly happy).
Our chorale concert went well. I did not miss any entrances (although a few other people did), and I did not trip on my very long dress while walking up the steps backstage. Also, I got the girl next to me to tell me when to bow so I didn’t look like an idiot just standing there. Kaitlin played the violin in one of our songs, and she rocked, or as much as you can rock when playing a slow and mushy love song. Hmm, maybe that wasn’t the right adjective. Well, she was excellent anyway, and I would have yelled, “YAY KAITLIN!” at the top of my lungs, but the teacher would have swooped down and thrown me off the stage to my death. (OK, exaggeration.)
My CD from All-State choir came in the mail. It is absolutely amazing, hearing the sound all 450 of us made! I also just got done watching the DVD of all the marching band shows I’ve been in. That brought back lots of memories.
Anyway, my back is starting to hurt and my arms are cold, so I want to get under my covers. I may write again tomorrow in study hall. Parting thought: CREDO EN UNUM DEUM!!!! (Line of the Latin piece we sang at the concert)
KD
